What is the Gottman Four Horsemen?

The Four Horsemen are four communication patterns that Dr. John Gottman identified as predictors of relationship breakdown with 93% accuracy: Criticism (attacking your partner's character), Contempt (treating your partner with disrespect), Defensiveness (making excuses or playing the victim), and Stonewalling (withdrawing and shutting down). Our Red Flag assessment is based on this research.

How do I know if my relationship has red flags?

Red flags include patterns of controlling behavior, lack of respect, dishonesty, emotional manipulation, isolation from friends/family, and any form of abuse. Our free 37-question assessment helps identify these warning signs based on proven psychological research.

Is the relationship assessment quiz free?

Yes, all core assessment tools on CheckYourRelationship are completely free. This includes the Red Flag Detector, Safety Assessment, Compatibility Check, and access to our Q&A community. We believe safety tools should never be paywalled.

Is my assessment data private?

Absolutely. Your assessment answers are 100% private and anonymous. We use client-side encryption for sensitive data like exit plans, and your personal data is never sold or shared. You can also use our Quick Exit feature at any time.

Should I marry my partner quiz - how accurate is it?

Our 'Should I Marry Them?' assessment helps you identify deal-breakers and compatibility factors based on research from the PREPARE/ENRICH program used by over 4 million couples worldwide. While no quiz can make your decision for you, it provides evidence-based insights to help you make an informed choice.

UPDATE: My (30M) girlfriend (30F) has show…

Hi there - this is an update on my post from earlier in the week about my girlfriend being odd with recent work travel. The original post is here: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship\_advice/s/0NWN1iakC7 Based on all of the comments, I had decided I was going to be pretty blunt with her when she returned and demand some answers. She returned from her trip on Friday morning, we were supposed to go to a friend’s vacation home for the holiday weekend so I wanted answers before doing that or it was just going to eat at me all weekend. When she got home after about 10 minutes, I said we needed to sit down and have an honest and real conversation and I expressed all of my doubts and concerns and the red flags in her actions of late and basically said that I deserve the truth and honesty. She pretty much caved immediately. She started crying and finally gathered herself enough to admit she has been sleeping with her manager on trips. Obviously I am extremely gutted, a mess, confused, lost, etc and all the other adjectives and words you can think of. I ended things immediately. She tried to change my mind with any and every tactic - not going to work. I blocked her number and on social media. Her friends and sister have tried reaching out to me, I told them the true situation. Her 3 friends backed off pretty quickly and her sister basically tried to gaslight me somehow which was pretty infuriating but I admit I’ve been able to laugh about that part now. I packed stuff to go and stay at my friend’s place and have plans to move my stuff out of our apartment on Tuesday of this upcoming week. Appreciate everyone’s blunt assessment and comments - it wasn’t what I wanted to hear but obviously needed to hear. Time to try and move on ✌🏻 submitted by /u/ThrowRA-TowerSilver to r/relationship_advice [link] [comments]