My boyfriend (34M) knew I (35F) didn't want unprotected sex. Now I'm pregnant and don't remember having sex.

I'm looking for outside perspectives because I'm struggling with how to view what happened. A few weeks ago, my boyfriend (34M), my roommate, and I (35F) went to a concert. I got extremely drunk. Not "buzzed" drunk.....completely obliterated. I was falling over, couldn't walk properly, and could barely function. My boyfriend had also been drinking, but not to the same extent. He was sober enough to drive us over an hour home after the concert. According to my roommate, I went straight to bed when we got home. I have very little memory of anything after leaving the concert. About 2–3 weeks later, I started having pregnancy symptoms and got a positive pregnancy test. Based on the timing of the tests, the pregnancy appears to be very early. The problem is that, to my knowledge, I had not had any sexual contact in months. I have absolutely no memory of having sex. When I told my boyfriend I was pregnant, he casually said he doesn't really remember having sex either, but thinks it might have happened when we got home from the concert. His explanation technically fits the timeline, and because I was so intoxicated, I wouldn't remember it. Some additional context: I do not want this pregnancy. I stopped sleeping in the same bed as him after finding out. Before this happened, he knew I did not want to have sex unless we could prevent pregnancy. I had explicitly told him I didn't want sex because he has difficulty maintaining an erection long enough to use condoms, and I did not want to risk getting pregnant. He was aware of that position. He frequently joked about getting me pregnant, which has always bothered me because he doesn't seem to take the possibility seriously. Part of me feels responsible because I chose to get that drunk. Another part of me keeps coming back to the fact that I was apparently so intoxicated that I have no memory of what happened, and I had previously made it clear that I did not want unprotected sex. I'm not looking for legal advice. I'm trying to understand how other people would view this situation. If your partner had sex with you while you were so intoxicated that you have no memory of it, after you had previously said you did not want unprotected sex, would you consider that consensual? Edit: I left this out as to not muddle up the question with judgement but he is gone as of last night and I am absolutely getting an abortion. I have zero hesitation on both of those things. I'm just still trying to, I guess, categorize what happened in my own head. submitted by /u/Global_Maybe_9105 to r/relationship_advice [link] [comments]