I (28M) asked my wife (27F) for a paternity test on our unborn child and ever since she has gone through several reactions?

My wife and I have been together for 10 years. We have been married for two. Baby was planned. I was excited at first to be a dad, but quickly started to get a bad feeling. She had two early ultrasounds that I could not attend because of work, which was discussed ahead of time and she told me she would rather I get paid and then take a day off (paid) for the anatomy scan. A couple of days after the first scan she took my phone to work with her and left me with hers. At first I didn't realize and I saw she had texted her guy friend, who is technically only supposed to be a friend because he's dating her bestie, and shared the scan picture with him before she texted it to me. I also saw they had texted a lot but didn't read them all. I tried to shake it off and left the phone alone after that. I was doing good at convincing myself there was nothing to worry about. But then she left her phone at home another day and it was ringing constantly so I answered it. There was a guy on the other side who hung up the second he realized I wasn't her. The name was unfamiliar so I wasn't sure what that was about but he sent a text a few minutes later and it made me suspicious so I looked. I then realized it was the same contact she sent the scan picture to. The name was changed and they had texted since then. She sent him the second scan picture and then I saw he had brought her to both scans. She told me she went alone so I was like wtf. Their texts weren't really flirty or outright screaming affair but there were a lot of them and the recent ones were strange. The last one was freaking out that I answered her phone and another from her was freaking out that I had her phone when she took mine that other day. I asked my wife about it when she got home and she got mad at me for going through her phone. She refused to answer because I had looked. I sat on it for the rest of that day and the next morning I told her I wanted a paternity test. I expected her to be mad, which she was, and she told me if I didn't trust her I could leave. I told her I wanted the test regardless and she said no. Then a few days later she said fine but accept our marriage is over. I told her okay. But the test was being done. Then she asked me if I had calmed down yet and was I ready to get over this. I told her I still wanted to do the test. She asked me why and she told me she was sorry for lying and sorry for changing the guys name but she didn't want me to be uncomfortable with another man taking her. I asked why change his name though. I said it made no sense unless she was hiding something. She claimed she wasn't thinking straight. I agreed to meet her to discuss it more and said we needed to discuss the guy too. She brought him, and he wasn't the friends boyfriend, when we met up and he was clearly very awkward about it. He left after a few minutes. She told me she hoped that was enough to put this to rest and I told her I would still need that test. She told me she would never cheat and she couldn't believe I would deny the baby we planned. I told her I needed to be sure because the whole thing was weird. She has been pleading with me since to trust her and not to do this. I still want the test. The baby could be mine. I'm not denying that fact. But I still think something is weird about this whole thing. She's really trying to make this marriage work but I don't know what to do if the test shows the baby is mine because I can't say she's cheated but this has rattled us. Her reluctance to do the test as well is playing on my mind. The very last time we talked she said we would do it. But I'm not sure what the future holds. I know this is a very big thing and asking is marriage ending either way. submitted by /u/ThrowRABotzons to r/relationship_advice [link] [comments]